The secret door to my internal struggles. It's a dark battle and it's never going to be won. At least not by me.

Tag: temptation



I’m going to l…

I’m going to let myself eat a little more for dinner tonight because I’ve been at a net. of under 0 calories for the past two days with doing hardly any exercise and eating nothing except for cucumber, mushroom and carrot. I’m scared of getting to a plateau. This is going to be so hard to eat without feeling guilty and to keep it down, but I’m going to try. I’ll make a salad with some vegan sausage and maybe a piece of bread. It’s so hard to stay strong when I go to my Dad’s because my step-mum is always baking things and they buy my favourite foods, but I’m going to try! 

I’ll be sure to keep you updated.

There is bloody…

There is bloody vegetarian spring rolls and samosas in my kitchen and they smell so damn good! I won’t give in! I can’t! My fast would have been for nothing.

Willpower, don’t fail me now!

I’m going to a family lunch for my Grandma’s birthday today. Hopefully I can stay strong and just eat the salad that I made. There will be cakes, bread, creamy things, pasta and ughhhh.

Willpower this is not the day to fail me!

My step-mum is …

My step-mum is making homemade bread this morning. I’m not tempted to eat it just yet because the smell hasn’t drifted upstairs. When she takes it out the oven though….. Oh god, give me strength!

I’m so worried…

I’m so worried about this weekend. I’m going to my Dad’s and my step-mum always bakes bread and sweets and makes the house smell wonderful. Then I have my Grandma’s birthday on Sunday and my whole family cooks everything that they are best at, so there is homemade bread, chocolates, biscuits, slices, cakes, cheeses etc. I’m trying not to purge, but I know that if I eat any of those things I’m going to. Hopefully someone has made salad so I can pick at it and pretend that I’m eating a lot, or even better I have to sit at a table with my little cousins because there isn’t enough room. I’m so scared that my progress is going to go out the window. I’m going to die!