Biggest failure

by Perpetual Slumber

I had a salad with a handful of spinach, some cucumber and carrot because I had to eat with everyone. They had pasta though so thank god I avoided that. Anyway, I couldn’t purge any of it :( I tried and tried, but all that came up was liquid and then nothing.I feel like such a fat failure. I’m supposed to be fasting!! I wanted to do it for at least 24 hours!   Thursday I’ll definitely pull it off though. Mum works late so nobody is home to hound me about it and if I’m lucky I can be almost in bed when she gets home so she won’t ask me what I had and if I want anything else.

Then to make matter worse I just got told that we have friends coming over for pizza on Friday night. I’m just going to pull out the ‘I don’t like pizza excuse’, but I’ll still feel like they’re watching me and judging me on what I’m eating. I’ll have to eat something because they’ll be all in my face about it otherwise, so maybe I’ll roast some vegetables or something. It’s like a never ending fight to avoid situations involving food. Why do people eat so much and so often? I just want to be alone with Ana so I can actually achieve my goals.